Let Her Laugh

Hi there, it's Olivia,

I watched a TED talk this morning about the power of laughter. Did you know that one hour of laughter can increase your immune system for 24 hours? And that the positive mood that laughter and play create can increase your life expectancy by 10 years?

I have a loud laugh. Mouth wide open, head back, all-in laughter! In most cases, people love it and even consider it to be contagious. Yet, there are others that find it to be too much and embarrassing.

As I have mentioned before, I grew up in the South. Where daughters should be pretty, gentile, well-mannered, and quiet. My mother was no shrinking violet. Quite the contrary, I would describe her to be a steel magnolia. She was a complex living dichotomy. Caught between the generational pull of the traditional role of supportive wife and mother and the perfect southern woman, with the desire to speak her mind and explore the world. We were lucky that she was able to stay at home when we were young. Fostering our talents by taking us to dance, art, and piano lessons. And bless us with incredible home-cooked meals every night. But she also considered her daughters to be an extension of herself, therefore we needed to be perfect as well. Which is where the criticism came in. “Olivia, don’t laugh so loud!” “Stop dancing in the house or you will knock something over! “ “Did you gain weight?” “Are you sure you want to go out with your hair like that? “ “You should probably put on a little makeup.” And my personal favorite, “You didn’t want to maybe wear something with a sleeve on it? “ when looking at me in my wedding dress on my wedding day. Unfortunately, this is not an uncommon dynamic. That has been passed down from generation to generation. But why are we being taught shame? Shame causes anxiety, depression, and low self-esteem. Shame reduces the empowerment to stand up for ourselves. And increases the chances of becoming victims of abuse. Let's agree to stop the cycle right now. Laugh! Twirl! Dance! Speak! Be! Celebrate who you are and encourage your daughters to do the same. The world will be all the better for it.

Until next week, Love, Olivia